TV Addiction Steals Best of Life - Part 2

Even when it feels like I’m not doing much, I remind myself that if I were watching TV I’d be doing nothing at all.

Slow progress is still progress.

Peace After Creation

This is the best time of all for me.

Now that the sculpture, 'Rest and Sing', is standing and has its basic finish, it’s alive and ready to fly on its own. It has life, a life that may exceed those of my great great grandchildren.

I am experiencing a peaceful quiet feeling, a contentment. The birth is over, or nearly so, and the new life is begun.


Open Door at Thirty Six

Today I turn 36 years old. I feel very good, very excited about the possibilities this year brings. The feeling I have had for so many years of waiting to get out of the starting gate has finally given way to an open door into the wonder of life. I am having fun. I’m also very tired, but it’s a good tired based on plenty of fulfilling activity.

Aboriginal Wisdom

In the book ‘Mutant Message,’ (since called into question as biography) the author talks about life for the aboriginals of Australia. In their view we tend to live our lives as ‘mutants.’ They feel that much that we do is superficial and unrelated to the real ‘meat’ of life. For the aboriginals of Australia, life is about improving the soul, involving the development of talents, a positive attitude to each day, gratitude to the 'Oneness' for every gift, and doing that which always is for the greatest good. Another facet of their life acknowledges the need to grow and change, to shed the old and to live the new. Once a life work is complete, or no longer brings joy, it may be time to change, to move on, to keep growing.

Not So Long Lengths - Part II

During my swimming time this morning I again thought through my life during the laps. I was struck again by the shortness of my life so far. Thirty five years is a very short time to be conscious.

I was also struck by the arbitrary way certainty and certainties became a part of my thinking. Perhaps it is because of the shortness of life that we adopt certain values and attitudes as certainties by necessity and without reflection, so that we can function - equivalent to instinct or instinct’s function in animals? Is university a place where youthful certainties are challenged? Or are the certainties of youth simply replaced by the dogmas of professors?

As we mature, we see things more clearly as they are, but early acquired certainties are ever hard to disregard.

I finished mounting the Dall Sheep Horn carving onto its newly completed base yesterday. Exhilarating!

Not So Long Lengths: A Swimming Excercise

While I was swimming lengths in the pool today, I tried a little exercise. I tried to imagine what I was doing in my life each year during each of the first thirty five laps of my swim. One lap, one year.

Talk about one’s life flashing before one’s eyes. My life went by very quickly, like a breath.

I remembered always feeling so old and mature and responsible. I realized that I have always been on the move, on the go; the world, in my mind, resting on my shoulders.

There were also whole episodes of my life, which I remember as being very significant, which passed in two or three lengths. Many lengths passed during which it was difficult to recall anything. Strangely, I don’t recognize a lot of me in my life. Life has happened to me, with no thought for the future and blind trust in the present.

It occurred to me during this review to lighten up a bit and enjoy my kids and my wife, to treasure my family. That it is good to do the things that make our hearts glad and to hell with significance, it has played the role of the impostor too long. To dream and work to make the dream reality.

While swimming lengths for exercise it seems that the first thirty lengths take forever, but the rest fly by. Will this also be true of my life's 'laps'? Where do I want to be five 'laps' from now? Ten? I will put myself in the way of art and see where life takes me.

I am here; this is my time.

Reading and Life

I wonder if life reaches stale points sometimes because of a lack of thought; if there is a certain energy for living which comes directly from thinking new thoughts and considering fresh ideas.

Strangely, I have always viewed reading as extraneous to living.

Fear of a Wasted Life

Just before lunch a kind of depression hit, probably from fatigue, the lateness, the running, partly from lack of food, but it consisted of a distress that life is going by and I may be wasting mine. I have so much going for me, and yet do so little. I feel as though I should be doing something significant, but what does that mean for me?

Is it adventure I long for? Perhaps I need to learn to make the most of my current place in life. Rather than bemoan that I am not someone else, somewhere else, I will be me, here. I still think it would be great to take a year off to travel the world.

Coasting, Not Living

My blocks seem to be related to time, money or willingness. I think I'll start keeping a record of activities and a monthly tally of finances, to see where my time and money go. Though we make a lot, we seem to spend a lot. Also, as I've mentioned, I have been impressed lately with the brevity of life and therefore the importance of living each day, so I will find out what I do and make it conscious. Jesus' admonition to live each day takes on a renewed meaning, but it is something I need to remind myself about as I tend to coast rather more than I tend to live.

Getting Through the Day

The fact that all die means that I will die. That the words on this page may well outlive me is remarkable.

Today the world seems so much more vibrant and alive, pulsating with surprising energy, but my tired eyes close it off in order to "get through" the day.

What a statement! What a mistake!

Life as a Golf Game

I wonder if life moves from a state where time moves so slowly, to an awareness that life is slipping by, to a panic and race against time, to a making peace with time and mortality? I am just becoming aware of how fast time is slipping by and twinges of panic occur every once in a while.

I am reminded of the game of golf. Where once I was eager to get on to the next hole, I now savour each one. Focus and deliberation, a sense of fun and persistence, despite a bad stroke or three, and never giving up ... all good life lessons!